"I'm a social scientist, Michael. That means I can't explain electricity or anything like that, but if you ever want to know about people I'm your man."
Tags:social scientist, social scientists, electricity, social study, social studies, social sciences, anthropology, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, knowledge, major, majors, bachelor's degree, ba, bas, sociology, sociologist, sociologists, anthropologist, anthropologists, archaeology, political science, useless knowledge, useless information, scientist, scientists, hard science, hard sciences, dad, dads, father, fathers, parent, parents
"These medicines all taste pretty good - let's approve them."
Tags:fda, food and drug administration, approve, approves, approval, medicine, medicines, medication, medications, prescription, prescriptions, drug, scientist, scientists, food science, health, healthy, unhealthy, overprescribe, overprescribing, overprescription, overmedicate, overmedicating, careless, carelessness, uncaring, side effect, side effects, approved, big pharma, pharmaceutical, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical company, pharmaceutical companies
"They're harmless when they're alone, but get a bunch of them together with a research grant and watch out."
Tags:rabbit, rabbits, science, scientist, scientists, scientific, professor, laboratory, lab, biology, physics, chemistry, lab coat, academic, academics, research, researchers, post doc, post doctoral, phd, doctorate, doctoral, post grad, graduate, research grant, grants, research project, research assignments, word play, play on words
"Actually, I got some pretty good ideas when I was in the box."
Tags:clichés, think outside the box, thinking outside the box, word play, office cubicle, office cubicles, office job, office jobs, office worker, office workers, cliche, ideas man, ideas men, innovator, innovators, creative thinking, creative thinker, creative thinkers, innovation, good ideas, bright ideas, equation, equations, formula, formulas, conformity, working environment, working environments, scientist, scientists, scientific, breakthrough, breakthroughs
"The research shows that rats who comment on-line are dumber than rats who don't."
Tags:animal, animals, rat, rats, lab rat, lab rats, mice, mouse, scientific research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, animal testing, technology, computer, computers, internet, online, social media, social network, social networks, social networking, forum, forums, comment, comments, commenting, intelligence, troll, trolls, trolling, dumb, dumber, stupid, stupidity, smarts, research, study, studies, modern life
"Bring me a stem cell."
"We've done it! We've done it! We've discovered a detergent that takes the chore out of washing and makes all other detergents seem old-fashioned by comparison!"
Tags:scientific research, science, testing, test, tests, experiment, experiments, research, researcher, researchers, scientist, scientists, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, chemical, chemicals, chemistry, chemist, chemists, discovery, discoveries, celebrating, detergent, detergents, washing, cleaning, laundry, chore, chores, housework, invention, inventions, innovation, innovative, old-fashioned, dancing
"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country."
Tags:lab rat, lab rats, laboratory, laboratories, lab, labs, rat, rats, mouse, mouses, mice, scientist, scientists, maze, mazes, drug trial, drug trials, animal experiment, animal experiments, animal experimentation, ambitious, pushy, college fund, college funds, parent, parents, support, supportive, parental support, sacrifice, sacrifices, work life, home life, animal testing, work, profession, professions, parenting, parenthood
Tonite 5-8: Is string theory bullshit?
"Ulrich, that's bad science and you know it!"
Tags:witch, witches, wizard, wizards, cauldron, cauldrons, alchemy, alchemist, alchemists, potion, potions, spell, spells, magic, magic spell, magic spells, scientist, scientists, test, tests, testing, scientific method, sorcerer, sorcerers, sorcery, science, know better, knows better, quack, quacks
"I suppose this is goodbye."
Tags:biology, biological, biological processes, cell, cells, cell division, division, separation, romance, romantic, romantically, love, loving, split, torn, torn apart, goodbye, farewell, divide, divides, dividing, bacteria, bacterium, science, scientific, scientifically, scientist, geneticists, human biology, natural sciences, natural science, microscopic life, microscopic, relationship, bond, bonds, miss you, missing, missing you, wish you were here, goodbye
"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."
"The arms wouldn't be so noticeable if he'd stop playing air guitar."
Tags:evolution, evolve, evolved, evolves, science, scientific, sciences, biology, biological, science, scientific, scientist, scientists, scientifically, prehistoric, pre historic, pre-historic, pre-history, dinosaur, dinosaurs, t rex, tyrannosaur, tyrannosaurus rex, tyrannosaurus-rex, air guitar, arm, arms
"I don't know - the minute I figured out how to make it self-aware it realized it was naked, ran, and hid from me."
Tags:robot, robots, robotics, scientist, scientists, inventor, inventors, self-aware, self-awareness, singularity, self-conscious, self-consciousness, inventor, inventors, invention, inventions, scientist, scientists, scientific, scientific discovery, scientific discoveries, hide, hides, hiding, hidden, fear, fears, fearful, fearfulness, consequence, consequences, unintended consequence, unintended consequences, unintentional
"So! How is everybody today?"
"Did you remember to scatter a few lance points and arrowheads back there for future generations to ponder?"
Tags:arrowhead, arrowheads, lance, lances, lance point, lance points, future generation, future generations, caveman, cavemen, scientist, scientists, archaeology, archaeologist, archaeologists, acheology, archeologist, archeologists, generation, generations, arrow head, arrow heads, paleolithic, neanderthal, neanderthals, prank, pranks, pranking
"And it should take no more than fifteen minutes for you to begin experiencing the first pleasant symptoms of arousal."
Tags:arousal, arousals, symptom, symptoms, mad scientist, test subject, test subjects, mad scientists, scientist, scientists, science experiment, science experiments, test tube, test tubes, experimentation, human testing, test, tests, experimenting, experiment, experiments, lab, labs, lab rat, lab rats, laboratory, laboratories
"Alright, Ms. Ramsey, send in the clones."
Tags:secretary, secretaries, reception, receptionist, receptionists, intercom, intercoms, science, science fiction, scifi, sci-fi, clone, clones, scientist, scientists, office, offices, business, businesses, businessman, businessmen, executive, executives, song, songs, lyrics, lyric, music, medical, doctor, doctors, technology, cloning
"Whatever it is, it's very, very little."
"Are you sure you're not just teaching to the test?"
Tags:teaching to the the test, no child left behind, teacher, teachers, teaching, standardized test, standardized tests, standardized testing, maze, lab rat, lab rats, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, lab assistant, lab assistants, lab assistance, mice, mouse, rat, rats, educator, educators, professor, professors, knowledge, learn, learns, learning, learning difficulty, learning difficulties, scientist, scientists
"Surely two people as intelligent as we are can work out some method of falling in love."
Tags:fall in love, falls in love, falling in love, intelligent, intelligence, incompatible, incompatibility, compatible, compatibility, chemistry, lack of chemistry, date, dates, dating, single life, desperate, desperation, brain, brains, academic, academics, scholar, scholars, educated, educated people, egghead, eggheads, nerd, nerds, geek, geeks, geeky, nerdy, scientist, scientists, study, studies, studying
"I bet you feel pretty ridiculous bringing that wind chime."
"We'll take it."
Tags:maze, mazes, rat, rats, mouse, mice, real estate, real estate agent, real estate agents, real estate agency, estate agent, estate agents, new house, new home, apartment, apartments, dream house, dream houses, dream home, dream homes, ideal home, ideal homes, home buyer, home buyers, natural habitat, lab rat, lab rats, scientist, scientists, study, studies, scientific study, scientific studies
"I've been reading the trashiest scientific abstract."
Tags:abstract, abstracts, scientific abstracts, journal, journals, peer review, peer reviewed, academic, academics, academia, guilty pleasure, guilty pleasures, trash, trashy, trashiest, scientist, scientists, trash, tabloid, tabloids, paperback, paperbacks, professor, professors, instructor, instructors, teacher, teachers, university, universities, college, colleges
"It's alive! It's nearly impossible to tell the difference, but it's alive!"