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"Do you think we'll ever regret having two plants and a bowl of pebbles instead of kids?"
"Tonight the part normally played by the audience will be played by actors playing the part of the audience."
Drop your Daughter Off at Work Day
"I need you to take over while I'm on the road to fuller, thicker hair."
"Phil, I'd like you to meet Brian. Brian will be posing for the picture jacket of your new novel."