Suing Cartoons

"Do you have any picture books that could help a child understand tort reform?"

"You look great for someone who's just come through two years of litigation."

"This firm has a long history of bringing gravitas to frivolous lawsuits."

"There's a Mr. Egg McMuffin here who says we've been using his name without permission."

"Remember, in this negotiation you're the 'Paula Abdul.'"

Lawsuits

"Does it hurt when my attorney does this?"

Lawyer-Country Safari

"'Vengeance is ours,' saith Courtland, Mumford & Blaine."

"Your case is pretty weak. I suggest preëmptive litigation."

"Sue the bastards."

"Don't you threaten me, Felner! I have a law degree and I know how to use it."

"Look, I'm not blaming you. I'm just suing you."

"Your mother and I still think two dollars a week is plenty, but, in an effort to avoid litigation, we're willing to go to two seventy-five."

"And my lawyer says we have a hell of a case against La-Z-Boy."

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

"Your infection may be antibiotic-resistant, but let's see how it responds to intensive litigation."

"Your dish will be out just as soon as it clears legal."

The Farmer, The Log And The Log's Attorney

"The sooner I start smoking, the sooner I get my big settlement from the tobacco companies."

"I'm not a lawyer. I'm just drafting."

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

The Litigant

"Our religious friends are praying, our atheist friends are sending good thoughts, and our lawyer friends are figuring out who to sue."