Support Cartoons

"But that's what being an artist is—feeling crummy before everyone else feels crummy."

"Funding for 'Nova' is provided by Merck and Lockheed, by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, and by annual financial support from viewers like you."

"Sorry, kiddo. Your old man has to work so you can go to the best drug trials in the country."

"Yes, we like the Yankees, but today we're all rooting for Boston."

"C'mon sweetie—you're only as bankrupt as you feel."

How To Get Up and Get Dressed

Pensioner carries sedan chair.

"While you were under, I had all your friends come in and sign your heart stent."

"I carry all my stress in Margaret's back."

"I can't believe I didn't think of this before."

"Honey, I still think you're the greatest."

"I do support your right to free speech - I just don't support your tone."

Grand Piano

"I love these quiet evenings at home battling alcoholism."

"For Pete's sake, stupid! It won't help anything if we boycott lettuce."

"I set a limit: one pity play per actor friend per year."

"We've received many letters from your constituents urging you to stay right where you are."

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

"Don't you think 'Workers of the world, unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains' will send the wrong signal to the financial community?"

"Oh, those are the lobbyists who get us our government subsidies."

A border wall that could find bipartisan support

"Don't bother waiting up tonight. I've got my wine-awareness group."

"Just in time. We need ballast."

"Kingsley—sing backup."

"When you hold me like this, you make me feel I can do anything."