"What do you think, Al—shall I use the tax cut for a CD-ROM drive or an Uzi?"
Irish Step Accounting
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accounting, accountant, accountants, dance, dances, dancing, irish dancer, irish dancers, irish step dancing, irish step dancer, irish step dancers, tap dancer, tap dancers, tap dancing, creative accounting, cook the books, cooking the books, tax, taxes, tax form, tax forms, number cruncher, number crunchers, tax day, tax return, tax returns"I'm a Schedule D kind of guy with a little Schedule E thrown in."
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schedule d, schedule e, accountant, accountants, accounting, 1040, 1040 form, 1040 forms, investor, investors, asset, assets, broke, lose money, loses money, losing money, investment, investments, broker, brokers, stockbroker, stockbrokers, tax return, tax returns, penniless, loss, losses, financial loss, financial losses, hedge fund, hedge funds, hedge fund manager, hedge fund managers, tax season, taxes, filing taxes, personality type, personality types, date, dates, dinner date, dinner dates, insolvent, insolvency"It's not enough to write 'Megabucks' on your return, Mr. Clacton. You're supposed to tell us how many."
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tax, taxes, tax return, taxed, rebate, irs, i.r.s., internal revenue service, tax collection, collection, income tax, income, form, forms, bureaucracy, rich, riches, wealth, wealthy, loaded, earning, megabucks, rich people, taxpayer, return, federal tax, state tax, local tax, form 1040"This is great! It's shaping up like it could be another huge tax writeoff for the boss."
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trump campaign, donald trump, president trump, president donald trump, tax, taxes, tax return, tax returns, write off, write offs, written off, writing off, fraud, tax fraud, trump campaign, donald trump campaigns, tax cheat, tax cheats, cheat, cheats, irs, internal revenue service, accountant, accountants, personal accountant, personal accountantsMasterpieces from The Golden Age of Tax-Deductible Contributions
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masterpiece, masterpieces, artwork, artworks, artist, artists, sculpture, sculptures, museum, museums, golden age, golden ages, tax deductible, tax deduction, tax deductions, art gallery, art galleries, art exhibit, art exhibits, art exhibition, art exhibitions, tax return, tax returns, tax, taxation, taxing"Bob, as a token of my appreciation for this wonderful lunch I would like to disclose to you my income-tax returns for the past four years."
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business, businessman, businessmen, business lunch, businessman's lunch, restaurant, restaurants, meal, meals, lunch, lunches, food, appreciative, thankful, grateful, appreciation, income tax, tax, taxes, tax return, tax returns, disclosing, accountant, accountants, accounting, trust, trusting, personal finances, finances, money, personal information"Sorry, folks, but I'll have to see your tax return."
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tax, taxes, tax return, taxed, tax returns, public good, public, public goods, publicly owned, general public, general public, tax returns, beach, beaches, sand, sandy, seaside, sea side, shore, shores, coast, seashore, holiday, holidays, immigration, immigrants, rights of use, coastal, taxpayer, taxpayer funded, funding, funds, enforce, enforced, enforcementTipping the I.R.S.
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tax, taxes, taxing, taxed, tax return, tax returns, internal revenue service, irs, i.r.s., hmrc, her majesty's revenue and customs, her majestys revenue and customs, hm revenue and customs, tax collecting, tax collector, tax man, taxman, service, tip, tips, tipping, hopeful, unhelpful, disliked, government, governments, money, monies, law, laws, return, returns, unusual, unlikely, bribe, bribes, bribery, corruption, corruptPlease be seated. A jack booted government thug will be with you shortly.
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irs, i.r.s., tax, taxes, taxing, taxed, tax return, government, big government, jack booted, hmrc, hm revenue and customs, her majesty's revenue and customs, oppression, authoritarian, authoritarians, governments, thug, thugs, jack booted thug, libertarian, libertarians, oppressive, taxation is theft, taxation is slavery, service, threatening, threatens, threatens, politics, political, nra, national rifle association, wayne lapierre"The unexamined life is 5 percent cheaper over the course of an average lifespan."
"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"
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irs, i.r.s., internal revenue service, inland revenue, hm revenue and customs, tax, taxes, taxation, taxed, income tax, income taxes, tax audit, audit, audits, accountant, accounting, accountants, bookkeeper, bookkeeping, bookkeepers, tax accountant, tax accountants, government, governments, government agency, government agencies, government employee, government employees, taxman, taxpayer, taxpayers, tax bill, tax bills, tax inspector, tax inspectors, tax return, tax returns, tax filing, tax filings, dramatic, being dramatic, overly dramatic, dramatics, drama queen, drama queens, overreaction, overreact, overreacting, overreacts, overact, overacting"He's at that awkward age - not completely out of the house but no longer a tax deduction."
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kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, family, families, teen, teens, teenager, adolescent, adolescence, awkward, age, ages, tax, taxes, money, finances, tax deduction, tax deductions, tax return, tax returns, tax credit, tax credits, adult child, young adults"Head of household? Now, who would that be?"
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head of household, 1040, income tax, income taxes, tax return, tax returns, individual income tax return, cat, cats, cat person, cat people, cat lover, cat lovers, cat owner, cat owners, boss, bosses, head of the family, family life, pet, pets, pet cat, pet cats, pecking order, pecking orders, questionnaire, questionnaires"File for an extension. . . Actually, that's a good idea."
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devil, devils, angel, angels, conscience, consciences, guilty conscience, guilty consciences, innocent, innocence, guilt, guilty, donald trump, president trump, trump administration, us politics, tax return, tax returns, income tax, income taxes, tax extension, tax extensions, taxation, trump presidency, american politicsIntroducing the 1040 - F.I.* Form (*The tax return for the financially incompetent.)
"Now, this over here, this is why you're going to have to go to jail."
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law, lawyers, jail, crimes, criminal, criminals, white collar crime, white collar crimes, business ethics, corporate ethics, tax avoidance, tax evasion, tax evader, tax evaders, tax avoider, tax avoiders, white collar, tax return, tax returns, taxation, taxes, jails, jail sentence, prison sentence, prison sentences, jail sentences, mankoffA man shows up to a lottery winner's door with a 1040 form.
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1040, 1040 form, 1040 forms, tax, taxes, tax season, tax seasons, tax form, tax forms, tax return, tax returns, income, income bracket, income brackets, tax bracket, tax brackets, lotto, lottery, lottery winner, lottery winners, lottery winning, win, wins, winning, winner, winners, irs, i.r.s., internal revenue service, file taxes, files taxes, filing taxes, audit, audits, auditing, auditor, auditors, accountant, accountants, personal accountant, personal accountants, winning, winnings