Unhappy Marriages Cartoons

"Did you do that to be hurtful?"

"I don't hate him because he's black. I hate him because he's my husband."

"I don't like him."

"And then she said, 'You're wearing that to the psychiatrist?'"

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

"I am not having this conversation again."

"You've changed, Howie."

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"Just wait till you walk in the front door—you'll find out if I have a death ray or not."

"Well, there's no sense in us both getting a lobotomy."

"You symbolize everything that's wrong with me."

"Peas and carrots, peas and carrots, always together... but are the really happy?"

"Oh, filled with hopeless longing. And you?"

"I sold his unlisted phone number to telemarketers."

"After your tomato plants, you have nothing left over for me."

"I try neither to encourage nor to discourage Pookie."

"Yeah? Well, I sentence you to death!"

"All right, all right, have it your way, Mrs. McCourtney. He's sitting right here, guzzling booze with a couple of blondes."

"Life Without Parole"

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

"Kate! Is this or is this not my ex?"

"Should we halfheartedly try to relate?"

"Mrs. Halper, do you really want me to grant you this divorce? Mr. Halper informs me that passages from 'The Velveteen Rabbit' were read at your wedding ceremony."

"Isn't it nice, Harry, that we can sit here together for a whole evening and not feel we have to make conversation?"

"My goodness, Marion. Our dishes are so spotless, I can see deep within my hollow, tormented soul!"