"Well, it's official. Any chance for candle-in-the-wind notoriety has pretty much passed us by."
Tags:candle in the wind, word play, play on words, sayings, saying, expression, expressions, dog, dogs, dog walking, dog walkers, dog walker, boyfriend, girlfriend, boyfriends, girlfriends, husband, wife, husbands, wives, couple, couples, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, spouse, spouses, middle aged, unlikely, unlikely pair, successful marriage, die young, dies young, dying young, premature, premature death, premature deaths, grow old, grows old, growing old, memorial, memorials, infamous, gone too soon
"Nope. Looks to me like a clear-cut case of suicide by somehow reaching around behind the back and sticking a knife in backward. Let's get a drink."
Tags:detective, detectives, police, crime, crimes, police officer, police officers, officer, officers, stab, criminal, stabbing, stabs, stabbed, kill, killed, killing, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, murderous, investigation, investigating, investigate, investigation, investigates, scene, crime scene, crime scenes, lazy, conclusion, unlikely, conclusions, laziness, work, working, bored, suicide, suicidal, suicides, incompetence, incompetent, cover up, coverup, cover-up, cover ups
"Since Frank retired two years ago, he's been on the alert for some long-dormant artistic talent to develop."
"Elsie is still waiting for postmenopausal zest to kick in."
Tags:menopause, menopausal, depression, depressed, depressing, lust for life, zest, seize the day, wait, waits, waiting, unrealistic, unlikely, long wait, long waits, lonely, loneliness, post-menopause, grow old, growing old, old woman, old women, senior, seniors, senior citizen, senior citizens, mental health
"Some Debussy, Igor."
Tags:stereotype, stereotypical, soundtrack, soundtracks, music, musically, musician, musicians, atmosphere, atmospheric, clash, clashed, clashing, debussy, classical, classical music, classic, classics, experiment, experimenting, experiments, experimental, doctor, doctors, inventor, invent, invents, invention, frankenstein, doctor frankenstein, monster, monsters, frankenstein's monster, igor, mad, insane, scientist, scientists, mad scientist, literature, literary, book, books, book lover, book lovers, bookish, culture, cultured, cultural, reference, referential, pianist, piano, unlikely, irony, ironic, dramatic irony
The 60 Hour Gourmet Recipe For People Who Have Time To Spare And Then Some.
Tags:gourmet, gourmet recipe, gourmet recipes, recipe, recipes, recipe book, recipe books, unrealistic, unlikely, time-consuming, cook, cooks, home cook, home cooks, home cooking, chef, chefs, home chef, home chefs, restaurant chef, restaurant chefs, impractical, impracticality, cookbook, cookbooks, cook book, cook books
"Always the last place you look."
Tags:whaler, whaling, harpoon, harpooning, seek, search, searching, whales, whale, sperm whale, crow's nest, look, looking, searched, crows nest, lost, hiding, hides, above, ocean, oceans, sea, seas, bot, boats, last place you look, moby dick, ahab, fiction, fictional, absurd, literature, big, huge, unmissable, unlikely
Tipping the I.R.S.
Tags:tax, taxes, taxing, taxed, tax return, tax returns, internal revenue service, irs, i.r.s., hmrc, her majesty's revenue and customs, her majestys revenue and customs, hm revenue and customs, tax collecting, tax collector, tax man, taxman, service, tip, tips, tipping, hopeful, unhelpful, disliked, government, governments, money, monies, law, laws, return, returns, unusual, unlikely, bribe, bribes, bribery, corruption, corrupt
"You don't look like a hurricane victim to me."
Tags:hurricane, hurricanes, hurrican victim, hurricane victims, tourist, tourists, poverty tourism, disaster, disasters, disaster tourism, disaster tourist, disaster tourists, lie, lies, lying, liar, liars, beggar, beggars, begging, panhandle, panhandler, panhandlers, wild story, wild stories, unlikely, unbelievable, skeptic, skeptics, skeptical, sceptic, sceptics, sceptical
Tags:college, colleges, university, universities, hybrid, hybrids, combination, combinations, combine, combines, combining, oil and water, ballet, ballets, blend, blends, blending, unlikely, starving artist, starving artists, ballet, ballerina, ballerinas, technology, doctor, doctors, hairstylist, hairstylists, cosmetology, cosmetologist, cosmetologists
"How the hell am I supposed to compete with that?"
Tags:compete, competes, competing, competition, santa, santa claus, doug jones, senate, senator, senators, alabama, democrat, democrats, democratic party, jeff sessions, sessions, present, presents, trump, anti-trump, unlikely, unlikely victory, unlikely victories, winner, winners, winning, gift, gifts, christmas gift, christmas gifts, christmas present, christmas presents, liberal, liberals
Country Music Awards
Tags:slang, cowboy, cowboys, cow boy, cow boys, wild west, west, western, westerns, old west, wild wild west, horseback, horses, horse, ye olde, modern, modern life, modernity, yehaw, cowboy hat, hat, 10 gallon hat, ten gallon hat, modern, modern life, modern world, culture, culture clash, country and western, country, american culture, american music, daddy issues, back off, standoffish, stand-offish, stand offish, rebel, rebels, underwhelm, underwhelming, genre, genres, critique, criticism, music, musician, musicians, trope, tropes, cliche, cliches, invert, inversion, inverted, subvert, subverted, subversion, music industry, region, regions, regional, award, awards, unlikely
"Sunshine Mixed with Intermittent Burgers."
"I hate to be a downer, but, statistically, people are more likely to die of heart disease than by getting
Tags:heart disease, zeus, lightning bolt, lightning bolts, god, gods, greek god, greek gods, roman god, roman gods, greek myth, greek mythology, statistics, hit by a bolt of lightning, stat, stats, unlikely, unlikely event, unlikely events, heart attack, heart attacks, heart disease, aim, aims, aiming, bad aim, poor aim, mock, mocks, mocking, disrespect, disrespects, disrespecting, disrespectful, throw, throws, throwing, bad shot, bad shots
"What's it all about, Alfie?"
"We divided it up so I do everything right and he does everything wrong."
Tags:always right, never right, husbands and wives, wife, wives, fishwife, husband, husbands, married life, marriage, unhappy marriage, unhappy, unhealthy, bad, relationship, divided, dividing, divvied, bias, biased, women, woman, modern marriage, spoof, spoofed, spoofs, unlikely, cell, cell phone, phone, phones, phone call, call, calls, called
"No, she likes me best!"
Tags:general, generals, army, armies, girl, girls, women, woman, dating, dates, approval, approving, likes me best, competition, competitive, childish, children, childlike, immature, babyish, infantile, juvenile, silly, unlikely, unbecoming, commander, commanders, officer, officers, military, militaries
"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."
Tags:cautionary tale, cautionary tales, role model, role models, basketball player, basketball players, basketball, mentor, mentors, mentoring, example, set an example, sets an example, setting an example, basketball court, basketball courts, autograph, autographs, autographing, basketball star, basketball stars, dream, dreams, dream job, dream jobs, athlete, athletes, professional athlete, professional athletes, unlikely, career, careers, career path, career paths, hero, heroes, idol, idols
BEWARE OF DOG
Tags:phantom, phantom of the opera, theater, theatre, theatrics, theatrical, play, plays, stage, musical, musicals, acting, actor, actor prepares, gothic, goth, tragic, tragedy, mysterious, mysterychurch organ, organ, music, musician, unlikely, unexpected, dog, dogs, secret life, pet, pets, domestic pet, beware of dog, keep out, beware, privacy, private
The Check in the Mail
Tags:solar system, the solar system, check, checks, check in the mail, lucky, get lucky, getting luck, winning money, unlucky, unlikely, improbable, remote, remote chance, remote chances, checks in the mail, in debt, debt, debtor, debtors, put-off, put off, putting off, putting-off, damage limitation, idiom, idioms, saying sayings, space, planet, planets
'6 One-Act Plays By 6 World Leaders'
Tags:vaclav, vaclav havel, literary, literary politicians, politicians and literature, politicians, politician, political, politics, politics, plays, play, theater, theatre, theatrical, theatrics, playwrights, author, authors, writer, writers, one-act, one act, show, shows, government, governmental, politics, political, positive, politics positive, advertising, unlikely, unlikely headlines, signs, signage, musci, musicals, broadway, celebrity, celebrities, stage, stage show, stageshow, world leader, leaders, world leaders, international, global, modern politics, modern, modern world
"I think I'll let my hair grow."
Tags:married, married life, mid life, midlife, mid-life, mid life crisis, midlife crisis, mid-life crisis, women, body image, ad, ads, advertise, advertising, advertisement, unrealistic, unrealistic expectations, impossible, standard, standards, advertisements, unlikely, hair, hair care, long hair, growth, growing, beauty, beautiful, product, products, marketing, marketting, brand, brands, branding, commercial, commercials, consumer, consumerism, televisions, television, tv, t v, t.v., t.v
"Have you two figured out that you're one of my nutty little juxtapositions?"
Tags:juxtaposition, juxtapositions, cartoonist, cartoonists, cartoons, meta, fourth wall, break the fourth wall, breaking the fourth wall, mismatch, mismatches, mismatched, couple, couples, cocktail party, cocktail parties, odd couple, odd couples, strange couple, strange couples, unlikely, unlikely couple, unlikely couples, artist, artists, artistry, subject, subjects
Tags:gullible, gullibility, cereal, cereals, breakfast cereal, breakfast cereals, breakfast, breakfasts, believer, believers, credulous, credulity, ad, ads, advert, adverts, advertisement, advertisements, advertising, sales pitch, sales pitches, deceive, deceives, deception, tall tale, tall tales, wild story, wild stories, unlikely, fraud, fraudulent, fraudulent claim, fraudulent claims, health benefit, health benefits, healthy food, healthy foods, processed food, processed foods
Other Rembrandt Misattributions
Tags:art, classical, classical art, art history, art histories, historical, hoax, hoaxes, satirical, satire, satires, portraits, portrait, portraits, painting, paintings, dutch, dutch masters, masters, painting masters, ethics, ethic, fakes, deepfake, deep fakes, fake, fakes, faked, forgery, forgeries, forged, unlikely, unlikely images, obvious, oblivious