"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."
Tags:father, fathers, fatherhood, son, sons, kid, kids, children, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, new mom, new mum, new dad, new dad, new parent, new parents, congratulations, congratulations, anti natalism, anti-natalisim, antinatalism, anti familial, expectation, expected, expectations, parenting, parental, parenthood, guilt, guilt trip, guilt-trip, guilty, impossible standards, high standards, impossible, impossible goal, impossible goals, unattainable, unreasonable, unreasonable expectation, sardonic, comment, commentary, stereotype, stereotyping, stereotypes, passive aggressive, guilt, guilts, guilting, guilt-inducing
"You symbolize everything that's wrong with me."
Tags:couple, couples, bad relationship, bad relationships, unhappy marriage, unhappy marriages, insult, insults, insulted, insulting, marriages, husband and wife, husbands and wives, gender issues, gender inequality, sexist, sexists, ball and chain, modern life, modern attitudes, blame, blaming, pass the buck, pass the blame, passing the blame, passing the buck, getting blamed, getting the blame, unreasonable
"We make substitutions within reason, Madame. We can give you courgettes instead of the aubergine, but we cannot provide Jean-Louis Trintignant in place of your husband."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, dining out, eating out, meal, meals, food, eating, dining, waiter, waiters, server, servers, service, customer service, order, orders, ordering, menu, menus, substitution, substitutions, aubergine, courgette, reasonable, unreasonable, customer, customers, customer request, customer requests, actor, actors, french actor, french actors, famous actor, famous actors, celebrity, celebrities, relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, relationship issues, relationship problems
"Oh, but it's fine for you to grade papers?"
Tags:bee, bees, beekeeping, beekeeper, beekeepers, teacher, teachers, marking, marking papers, homework, bedroom scene, couple, couples, bad relationship, bad relationships, marital fight, marital fights, marital dispute, marital disputes, argue, arguing, argument, arguments, unreasonable, unaccommodating, domestic, domestic argument, domestics, domestic arguments
"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."
Tags:heaven, angel, angels, spa, spas, dying, afterlife, the afterlife, after-life, the after-life, heavenly reward, god, gods, christianity, christians, judaism, jews, complain, complaining, dissatisfied, ungrateful, hotel, hotels, hotel spas, hotel spa, unreasonable, fitness, wellbeing, well-being, well being, day spa, day spas, immortality, paradise, imperfect, imperfection, life after death, afterworld, the afterworld, after world, the after world, after worlds, afterworlds
"Two out of three."
Tags:double or nothing, two out of three, best of three, duel, duels, duelling, duelist, duelists, pistol, pistols, gun, guns, pistols at dawn, shoot, shooting, shot, injured, injury, victorian, victorians, unreasonable, irony, ironic, ironically, kill, killed, honor, honour, honorable, honourable, honored, honoured, classic, classic joke, classic jokes, slapstick, slap stick, slap-stick, kill, killed, fatal, fatality, regency, edwardian, word play, words, game, games, competitive, word play, word-play, last words
"Alison, please phone Mr. Bradshaw and tell him I won't be available for lunch. Then call the Coast Guard and tell them I'm drowning near Long Branch, New Jersey."
Tags:ignorance, ignorant, stupid, stupidity, management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, cardboard, placeholder, place holder, unreasonable, request, childish, immature, stupid, stupidity, stuck, secretary, secretaries, personal assistant, personal assistants, pa, p.a, p.a., accident, accidents, accidental, call, calling, phone, phones, cell, cell phone, texting and driving, car, cars, car accident, car accidents, coast guard, priorities, priority
"The tissues are for crying."
Tags:psychology, psychologist, psychologists, counselor, counselors, counselling, counsel, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, therapy, therapies, therapist, therapists, shrink, shrinks, tissue, tissues, crying, cries, cried, runny nose, cold, colds, nose blowing, ill, illness, health, mental health, annoyed, annoys, annoyed, unreasonable, purpose
Tags:humbug, christmas, christmas time, christmas spirit, the christmas spirit, scrooge, bah humbug, kill joy, kill joys, winter, winter holiday, winter holidays, winter festivities, exaggerate, exaggeration, outraged, outrage, unreasonable, christmas day, surprise, surprises, unexpected, a christmas carol, charles dickens
"The innocence seems forced."
Tags:innocent, innocence, artist, artists, drawing, drawings, art critic, art critics, unfair criticism, kids drawing, kid's drawing, childs drawing, child's drawing, kindergarten, preschool, primary school, elementary school, teacher, teachers, modern art, art criticism, arts and crafts, insult, insults, high standards, unreasonable
"Can you rewrite this in 3-D?"
Tags:manager, managers, management, supervisor, supervisors, editor, edit, edits, editing, editors, agent, agents, claim, claims, request, unreasonable, unreasonable requests, unreasonable request, publishing, publisher, publishers, writer, writers, novel, novella, novels, novel writing, poem, poet, poetry, poets, poetic, literature, literary, word play, play on words, ironic, irony, author, authors, authored, book, books, book lover, writing, should be writing, you should be writing, manuscript, artistic, artist, artists, art, arts, culture, cultured, writer's block, bookworm, book worm, bookworms, book worm, book, books, novel, novels, book lover, book lovers, literature, literary, lit, lit major, read, reading, avid reader, readers, reader, novel, novels, novelist, novelists, critic, trend, trends, trending, trendy, 3d, 3-d
"This one's too hard to type on while I'm driving."
Tags:driving, driver, drivers, business man, business men, business people, business person, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, businesspeople, phone, phones, mobile phone, mobile phones, smartphone, smartphones, smart phone, smart phones, cell, cells, cellphone, cellphone, modern time, modern attitudes, modern life, modern technology, dangerous driver, dangerous drivers, dangerous driving, text, texting, type typing, message, messaging, text and drive, dont text and drive, don't text and drive, phone shop, phone shops, customer complaint, customer complaints, complaint, complaints, complaining, unreasonable
"I'm holding George back this year because he's failed to forge a personal style."
Tags:child, kid, kids, childhood, primary school, primary schools, elementary school, elementary schools, schools, schools, teacher, teachers, parents evening, parent's evening, parents' evening, parents evenings, parent's evenings, parents' evenings, parent teacher conference, parent teacher conferences, student, students, personal style, personal styles, buzzword, buzzwords, jargon, falling behind, fallen behind, held back, being held back, unreasonable, unnecessary, teacher, teachers
Opp'y of a Lifetime
Why Do We Always Want Something Better For Our Children Than What We Had For Ourselves?
Tags:napoleon complex, short, short man, short man syndrome, father, fathers, fatherhood, son, sons, kid, kids, children, height, heights, tall, taller, tallness, self conscious, bitter, sight gag, visual gag, someday, compensate, compensating, compensation, compensates, compensated, expectation, expected, expectations, parenting, parental, parenthood, impossible standards, high standards, impossible, impossible goal, impossible goals, unattainable, unreasonable, unreasonable expectation
"Confound it, Hawkins, when I said I meant that literally, that was just a ﬁgure of speech."
Tags:executives, executive, business executives, business executive, business executives, manager, managers, boss, bosses, business manager, business managers, misunderstand, misunderstanding, misinterpret, misinterpretation, figure of speech, figures of speech, literal interpretation, literal interpretations, unreasonable, expectation, expectations, let down, let downs, let-downs, let-down, ambiguous, ambiguity
"How slowly should I do this to make you the most upset?"
Tags:queue, queues, queuing up, line, lines, line up, waiting in line, waiting on line, lining up, customer service, bad service, bad customer service, receptionist, receptionists, slow line, slow lines, customer, customers, angry customer, angry customers, annoyed customer, annoyed customers, impatient, impatience, upset, upsetting, unreasonable, slow
"You'll come here,but you won't go to Brooklyn?"
Tags:taxi, taxis, cab, cabs, space, moon, moons, astronaut, astronauts, brooklyn, new york, new york cabs, inconvenient, illogical, sensible, no sense, distance, distances, big cheese, taxi cab, ridiculous, unfair, relatable, annoy, annoying, annoys, annoyed, drive, driver, taxi driver, taxi drivers, unreasonable
"What about me? Am I not a natural disaster?"
Tags:marriage, married, married life, couple, couples, old married couple, argument, arguments, argue, argues, arguing, bicker, bickers, bickering, problem, problems, late, home late, natural disaster, natural disasters, extreme weather, extreme, weather, home, unreasonable, irony, ironic, ironically, flatter, flattery, flattering, unreasonable expectation, unreasonable expectations, unreasonable request, unreasonable requests
"Damn it, Henderson, New York is still three hours ahead of us. Get on that!"
Tags:business executive, business executives, boss, bosses, new york, nyc, ny, new york city, new york, time, time zone, time zones, eastern standard time, subordinate, subordinates, regional time, regional time zones, time difference, time differences, california, hollywood, film industry, movie industry, film producer, film producers, getting ahead, get ahead, competition, competitiveness, order, ordering, ordered, director, directors, eastern time, pacific time, pacific standard time, unreasonable, unreasonable request, unreasonable requests, impossible request, impossible requests
"Look, don't try to weasel out of this. It was my dream, but you had the affair in it."
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, argument, arguments, arguing, fight, fights, fighting, conflict, conflicts, infidelity, cheater, cheaters, extramarital affairs, affair, affairs, dream, dreams, dreaming, excuse, excuses, illogical, unreasonable, woman, women
"Mrs. Stephens, could you please bring me in another pencil? This one is stuck."
Tags:ignorance, ignorant, stupid, stupidity, management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, cardboard, placeholder, place holder, unreasonable, request, childish, immature, stupid, stupidity, stuck, secretary, secretaries, personal assistant, personal assistants, pa, p.a, p.a., pencil, stationary, stationery, accident, accidents, accidental, silver spoon
"Miss Smith, have Ernesto and Florence come back from lunch yet?"
Tags:ignorance, ignorant, stupid, stupidity, management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, cardboard, placeholder, place holder, unreasonable, request, childish, immature, stupid, stupidity, stuck, secretary, secretaries, personal assistant, personal assistants, pa, p.a, p.a., accident, accidents, accidental, silver spoon, fish, fish bowl, fishes, lunch, on lunch, out to lunch, goldfish, gold fish, goldfish bowl, pet, pets, pet fish
"I'm looking for someone who's qualified to cover my mistakes."
Tags:ignorance, ignorant, stupid, stupidity, management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, cardboard, placeholder, place holder, unreasonable, request, interview, interviews, interviewee, employ, employee, new job, new career, mistake, mistakes, cover up, cover-up, unrealistic, consequences, when will you learn
"While you're waiting would you like to do his laundry?"
Tags:management, upper management, big boss, boss, bosses, manager, managers, exec, execs, executive, executives, cardboard, placeholder, place holder, unreasonable, request, laundry, laundry basket, airing his laundry, secretary, secretaries, personal assistant, personal assistants, pa, p.a, p.a., meeting, meetings, underling, underlings, respect, respectful, appointment, appointments, waiting, waiting room, recruiting, recruitment