"We'd like you to leave out the poorer, sickness, and death parts - they're a little dark."
Tags:vow, vows, marriage vow, marriage vows, personal vow, personal vows, marriage ceremony, marriage ceremonies, 'til death do us part, depressing, depression, depression, dark, sickness, wedding, weddings, bride, brides, groom, grooms, minister, ministers, request, requests, requesting, marriage vow, marriage vows, priest, priests, favor, favors, favour, favours, ask a favor, asking a favor
"And this is Brother Elvis."
My son is a made man in the primero crime family,
Tags:gang, gangster, gangs, gangsters, mafia, mob, mobster, mobsters, crime family, honor student, honour student, good student, honor students, honour students, good students, proud parent, proud parents, parent, parents, parenthood, criminal, criminals, car, cars, word play, bumper sticker, bumper stickers, sticker, stickers, initiated, initiation, mafia member, vows, oath, vow, oaths, silence, vow of silence, oath of silence, broken vow, broken oath
"I pronounce you man and wife. The clock is now running."
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, unhealthy relationship, unhealthy relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, wedding, weddings, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, ceremony, ceremonies, vow, vows, saying i do, wedding vows, bride, brides, groom, grooms, minister, ministers, priest, priests, clergyman, clergymen, pastor, pastors, clock, clocks, time, timer, timers, countdown, countdowns, divorce, divorces, divorcing, split, splitting, separation, separations, separating, modern life
Same Sex Wedding
"And do you both promise to believe you can be better than all the other married couples you've ever seen?"
Tags:officiant, officiants, priest, priests, minister, ministers, reverend, reverends, justice of the peace, vow, vows, wedding, weddings, keeping up with the joneses, bride, brides, groom, grooms, husband, husbands, wife, wives, relationship, relationships, couple, couples, spouses, spouse, marriage, married, wedding day, wedding days, commitment, commitments
"Do you further promise to love, honor and obey this insurance company and to disclose to it any pre-existing medical conditions?"
Tags:insurance, insurance coverage, health insurance, medical insurance, salesman, salesmen, agreement, agreements, contract, contracts, promise, promises, promising, vow, vows, wedding vows, exchanging vows, commitment, pre-existing conditions, pre-existing medical conditions, health, fitness, insurance agent, insurance agents, insurance agency, insurance agencies, insurance industry, insurance company, insurance companies, buying insurance
"Next year, I'm pleasuring myself."
Tags:salmon, masturbate, masturbates, masturbating, effort, efforts, mate, mates, swim upstream, swims upstream, swimming upstream, swim, swims, swimming, difficult, difficulty, not worth it, vow, vows, vowing, lazy, laziness, can't be bothered, spawn, spawns, spawning, journey, journeys, long journey, long journeys, fish
"Do you, Thomas, promise to pay attention for the first year and phone it in for the rest of your life?"
"Do you, Ashley, take Nesbitt and his genome to be your husband?"
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, wedding, weddings, bride, brides, groom, grooms, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, wedding vow, wedding vows, vow, vows, science, biology, genetics, gene, genes, genome, genomes, reproduction, kid, kids, child, children, fertility, dna, d.n.a., modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, genetic testing, genetic test, genetic tests
Tags:homophone, homophones, say one thing and mean another, hidden, hidden meaning, legal, legality, legalities, stand up in court, invalidate, invalidation, invalidates, validate, validation, nuptials, nuptial, vow, vows, wedding vow, wedding vows, i do, groom, groomsmen, dodgy dealer, matrimony, wedding, wedding ceremony, weddings, married, married life, marriage, red flag, dodged a bullet, bullet dodged, dealbreaker, deal breaker, word, words, word play, word-play, play on words, relationships, loophole, loop hole, loopholes, loop holes
"I'm going to give it all up and follow St. Francis."
Tags:st. francis, saint francis, nature, natural world, consumer, consumers, consumerism, agenda, agendas, icon, icons, iconic, poverty, vow of poverty, off the grid, going off the grid, saint, saints, catholic, catholics, catholicism, vow, vows, religious, christian, christians, christianity, media darling, media darlings, monk, monks, do without, doing without, spirituality
"I don't get mad—I get even."
"Yeah, we renewed our vows--his vow of silence and my vow of abstinence."
Tags:soccer, soccer fan, soccer broadcast, spouse, spouses, wife, wives, husband, husbands, partners, partner, significant other, significant others, couple, couples, relationship, relationships, marriage, marriages, married life, married lives, long term relationship, long-term-relationships, vows, vow, renew vows, renewing vows, renewed vows, vow of silence, vow of abstinence, sports widow, sports widows, sports fan, sports fans, abstinence, abstinent, lysistrata, bitter, bitter spouse, bitter spouses, angry wife, angry wives, bitter wife, bitter wives
"That's a very generous offer, David. Would anyone else on the board like to take a vow of chastity?"
"Do you, Scofield Industries, take Amalgamated Pipe?"
Tags:merger, mergers, business men, business man, business person, business people, business woman, business women, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, businesswomen, businesswoman, weddings, wedding, wedding vow, wedding vows, getting married, vow, vows, business merger, business mergers, company, companies, corporation, corporations, acquisition, acquisitions, modern life, capitalism
"I'm going to go home, turn on a kung-fu movie, and get my life in order."
Tags:kung fu, kung fu movie, kung fu movies, karate, martial arts, martial arts films, life change, life changes, motivation, motivations, motivate, motivates, motivating, vow, vows, goal, goals, plan, plans, planning, reset, resetting, change, changes, positive change, positive changes, slacker, slackers, slacking
"If there is anyone who objects to this union, either here or on the Internet, speak now or forever hold your peace."
Tags:relationship, relationships, wedding, weddings, marriage, marriages, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, vow, vows, bride, brides, groom, grooms, webcam, webcams, technology, modern life, online, internet, streaming, live streaming, live, live video, video feed, live videos, video feeds, camera, cameras, video camera, video cameras, audience, speak now or forever hold your peace, object, objection, objections, minister, ministers, priest, priests, pastor, pastors, clergyman, clergymen, modern life, modern wedding, modern weddings, broadcast, broadcasts, broadcasting, computer, computers, head camera, head cameras, action camera, action cameras
"I want to be cremated and have my ashes sprinkled on the Republican Party."
Tags:republican, republicans, republican party, republican party member, republican party members, gop, grand old party, loyal, loyalist, the base, lifelong member, lifelong members, revenge, get revenge, getting revenge, vengeance, deface, defaces, defacing, conservative, conservatives, conservatism, cremated, last wish, last wishes, deathbed, deathbeds, death bed, death beds, last rites, vow, vows, final vow, final vows
Spark Notes Wedding Vows
Tags:summary, summaries, sum up, sums up, summing up, spark notes, vow, vows, marriage vow, marriage vows, honest, honesty, truthful, truthfulness, cynic, cynics, cynical, marriage, marriages, wedding, weddings, wedding vow, wedding vows, brevity, pithy, brutal, brutally honest, brutal honesty, tolerate, tolerates, tolerating, modern life, modern marriage, modern marriages, monogamy, monogamous
"How about resolving that, starting next year, you won't be such a total jerk?"
Tags:new year, new years, new year's, new years eve, new year's eve, new year's day, new years day, resolution, resolutions, resolve, resolves, resolving, next year, jerk, jerks, insult, insults, insulting, suggestion, suggestions, suggesting, vow, vows, vowing, bad relationship, bad relationships, fall out, falls out, falling out, argue, argues, arguing, argument, bicker, bickers, bickering, couple, couples, bad match, bad matches, mismatched
"And do you promise to love, honor, and cherish each other, and to pay the United States government more in taxes as a married couple than you would have paid if you had just continued living together?"
Tags:relationship, relationships, marriage, married life, wedding, weddings, getting married, bride, brides, groom, grooms, couple, couples, newlywed, newlyweds, priest, priest, vow, vows, wedding vows, wedding vow, promise, promises, tax, taxes, united states, america, government, governments, filing taxes, together, living together, married couple, married couples, money, marriage rite, marriages rites, economy, economics, higher taxes, more taxes
"...until death do you a favor."
Tags:relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives argument, arguments, arguing, fight, fights, fighting, conflict, conflicts, nagging, suffering, wedding, weddings, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies, wedding vow, wedding vows, vow, vows, bride, brides, groom, grooms, death, until death do us part, favor, favors, favour, favours, relief, relived, escape, priest, priests, pastor, pastors, minister, ministers, clergyman, clergymen
"Do you promise to hate the same people?"
"The couple will now exchange vows they wrote themselves, because I guess mine weren't good enough, but, whatever, let's see what you've got."
Tags:wedding, weddings, wedding vow, wedding vows, marriage vow, marriage vows, vow, vows, personal wedding vow, personal wedding vows, writing your own vows, vicar, vicars, minister, ministers, officiant, officiants, passive aggressive, passive aggressiveness, traditional vows, groom, grooms, happy couple, happy couples, same-sex wedding, same-sex weddings, gay wedding, gay weddings, wedding ceremony, wedding ceremonies