"According to our time-and-motion studies, you handle your time very well but a lot of your motion is wasted."
Tags:time and motion, time-and-motion, time and motion studies, time-and-motion studies, time-and-motion study, time and motion study, review, reviewing, management, manager, managers, survey, surveys, business, businesses, efficiency, efficient, time management, office, worker, workers, motion, motions, misinterpret, parody, parodying, filing, files, business efficiency, manage, executive, executives, waste, wasted, wastes
Career Progression Ladder
Urban Compost Heap.
"I realize that each day is a gift. Now it's just a matter of figuring out how to exchange fourteen thousand six hundred of them."
Tags:gift, gifts, grateful, gratitude, gratefulness, life, cynic, cynics, cynical, dark humor, dark humour, exchange, exchanges, exchanging gifts, unwanted, present, presents, middle age, middle aged, midlife crisis, forty, forties, fortieth birthday, 40th birthday, age, birthday, birthdays, waste, wastes, wasted
Now on exhibit at the Museum of Discarded Exercise Equipment
Tags:exercise, exercises, exercise equipment, home gym, home gyms, gym, gyms, exercise machine, exercise machines, gather dust, gathers dust, gathering dust, waste, wastes, wasted, purchase, purchases, useless, fitness, physical fitness, personal trainer, personal trainers, gym equipment, newfangled
"You really just want to watch me punch myself in the face three times?"
Tags:genie, genies, wish, wishes, wishing, happy, happiness, content, contented, smug, smugly, smugness, punch, punches, punching, sadistic, sadism, suit, suits, sleazy, sleaze, mean, meanness, nasty, nastiness, hurt, hurting, waste, wasted, wastes, satisfaction, satisfied, power, powerful, lamp, lamps, smug, smugness
"I should like to propose a bonanza for the rich."
Tags:washington, capitol hill, monument, meeting, meetings, political, politics, oligarchy, political oligarchy, rich, the rich get richer, white collar crime, white-collar crime, policy, policies, benefit, benefits, one percent, upper class, upper classes, high society, exclusive, exclusively, rich, wealth, wealthy, bonanza, party, waste, wasting, wasted, meeting, meetings, board, board meeting, treason, for the people, comment, commentary, critic, critical, fat cat, fat cats, privilege, privileges
"After you've wished once for food, you can stop using your other wishes on food."
Dinner at the Mortgage Restaurant.
Tags:debt, debts, credit, credits, loan, loans, restaurant, restaurants, realtor, realtors, estate agent, estate agents, accountant, accountants, wasted, waste, lending, lends, banks, banking, bankers, poor, borrow, borrowing, borrows, high cuisine, rich, posh, fancy, food, foods, modern life, modern-life, property, price, prices, mortgages, comparison, parallel, parallels
"From now on, don't bring any newspapers with my breakfast!"
"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."
Tags:waste, wastes, wasting, wasted, allowance, allowances, pocket money, waste money, wastes money, wasting money, priority, priorities, prioritize, prioritizes, prioritizing, teenager, teenagers, teenage son, teenage sons, adolescent, adolescents, adolescence, waste, wastes, cliche, cliches, wisdom, words of wisdom, spending choice, spending choices, big spender, big spenders, stingy, father, fathers, dad, dads, parent, parents, raise, raises, refuse, refuses, refusing, teenage boy, teenage boys
"And your third wish?"
"This is your third wish. Are you sure you want to waste it on another free download?"