CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."
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"We'd love to come, but the weather mongers have paralyzed us with fear."
"Turning to the City Hall forecast, this brief period of contrition will be followed by increasing testiness, leading to major squalls on Monday."
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"He said it will be hot and muggy early in the week, with a slight chance of showers."
"We're expecting some major accumulation."
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"Rain in the Northeast, clear skies to the south, while large portions of the Midwest continue to be blanketed by Shirley MacLaine's aura."
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"But the weather looks great for the rest of the week."
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The Art of Bantering!
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"The forecast for today is grumpy."
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"But it's a wet heat."
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"And in the Dakotas—plenty of this!"
"Uh-oh, I think a storm has turned our valuable ocean-front property into worthless ocean-floor property."
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"The time is now 7:42 - and if you can hang on for half a sec, I'll witch you over to Phil with the weather."
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"Someday a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the street. But today, expect occasional sprinkles."
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Enemy of the people.
Tags:weatherman, weathermen, weather forecaster, weather forecasters, meteorologist, meteorologists, weather forecast, weather forecast, weather forecasting, bad weather, bad news, rain, raining, wet weather, rainy, shoot the messager, shooting the messager, enemy of the people, enemies of the people, climate change, climate change denial, climate change deniers, dog-whistle politics, modern politics