"I'm so glad you decided to participate in our Money for Employment program."
Tags:work, working, works, world of work, worker, employ, employment, employing, recruit, recruiting, recruiter, recruitment, employed, employs, word play, word, play on words, hire, hires, hired, you're hired, money, pay, paid, pay day, payday, business, business, exploit, exploitation, capital, capitalism, capitalist, critical, critic, critique, office, offices
'Where's My Job'
Tags:world of work, new job, new hire, hiring, hires, recruiting, recruitment, recruiter, human resource, human resources, hr, h r, pun, puns, word play, word-play, play on words, waldo, wally, invisible, invisible homeless, homeless, hobo, bum, job, jobs, fired, fire, unemployment, unemployed, dole, on the dole, benefits, public benefit, public benefits, beg, begging, beggar, beggars, character, characters
"Crumple this into a little ball, will you?"
Tags:paper, papers, crumple, crumpled, office, offices, work, worker, workers, working, working life, world of work, management, manager, managers, supervisors, supervisor, executive, executives, boss, bosses, big boss, delegation, delegate, delegating, delegations, employee, employers, employ, employed, business, hr, h r, human resource, human resources
Coming Soon to an Office Near You: Invaders From the Planet of the Recent College Graduates
Tags:graduates, younger generation, generation gap, youth, young, younger, hiring, hire, new hire, new hires, graduate, college grad, grad, grads, college grads, unemployment, unemployed, laid off, lay off, downsizing, cut, cuts, cutting costs, cutting cost, world of work, working world, millennial, millennial, baby boomer, baby boomers, age, ageing
"Tell me about your last accounting job."
Tags:interview, interviews, interviewing, employed, employee, employees, employer, working world, world of work, modern life, metaphor, metaphors, metaphorical, cookie from the cookie jar, cookie, cookies, cookie jar, cookie jars, account, accounts, accounting, accountant, accountants, fraud, frauds, fraudulent, caught, caught red-handed, caught redhanded, red-handed, bad reference, reference, references, fired, fire, fires, firing, laid off, lay-off, lay off, lay-offs, lay offs
"It's not that I don't like the job you're doing—it's just that I'd like to start seeing other people do it."
Tags:honest, honesty, honesty is the best policy, hire, hired, hiring, hires, personnel, hr, h r, h.r., human resources, business, big business, businessman, businessmen, business man, business men, exec, execs, executive, manager, management, corporate, corporation, corporations, employment, employed, fire, fired, firing, office worker, office drone, office drones, excuse, excuses, workplace, unfair, job, jobs, working world, world of work, capitalism, late stage capitalism, sardonic, sarcastic
"It means taking a healthy pay cut, but my dad has decided to stay at home and lock himself in the basement."
Tags:family, families, work, world of work, unemployed, unemployment, job search, pay, gallows humour, dark humour, dark humor, black humor, black humour, gallows humor, pink slip, laid off, quit job, resign, resignation, resign from work, recession, children, basement, hermit, mid life crisis, hide, neet, home office, home offices, depression, depressions, depressing, mid-life crises
"I fear there are only so many bamboo metaphors the average reader can tolerate."
Tags:interview, interviews, interviewer, interviewee, interview skills, interview skill, get hired, hired, hiree, hiring, hires, new hire, new hires, panda, pandas, talking animal, talking animals, job, jobs, new job, new jobs, working world, work, world of work, editorial, editor, editors, censor, censorship, metaphor, metaphors, puns, pun, overused, overuse, over used, over use, bamboo, bamboo joke, panda, pandas, cute, cute animals, manuscript, manuscripts, agent, agents, rejection, reject, rejected, book, books, bookish, book worm, book worms
"Where's Waldo in five years?"
Tags:where, where do you see yourself, in five years, five year plan, five-year plan, five-year-plan, planning, plan, plans, planned, career, careers, career plan, career advice, careers advice, job, jobs, job interview, interviews, interviewing, resume, good resume, cv, good cv, c v, interview skills, world of work, new job, new hire, hiring, hires, recruiting, recruitment, recruiter, human resource, human resources, hr, h r, pun, puns, word play, word-play, play on words
Exec Has His Whole Life At His Desk
Tags:desk life, life, work life, life work, work life balance, life's work, exec, executive, reason to live, sad, sadness, office, office life, desk, desks, desk jockey, desk job, desk jobs, businessmen, businessman, modern life, modern world, working world, world of work, critique, critical, critic, critics, commentary, comment, reduce, reduction, reduction of spirit, dystopia, dystopian, capitalism, capitalist
"What can I say? I was an English major."
Tags:grammar, grammar nazi, grammar nazis, fewer, items or less, correction, correct, english, english major, college, college graduate, grad, graduates, humanities, job, jobs, bitter, bitterness, world of work, literature, lit major, language, language skills, literacy, literate, literacy skills, register, registers, cash register, supermarket, supermarkets, groceries, grocery store, store, stores, clerk, clerks, proof, proofread, proofreading
"Employees must pumice feet."
Tags:employees must, employee bathroom, bathroom, employee toilet, toilet, toilette, toilets, employee toilets, work, working world, world of work, wash hands, hand, hand washing, hand-washing, hygiene, hygienic, pumice, pumice stone, restroom, restrooms, employee restroom, employee restroom, health, health code, up to code, disgust, cringe, cringy, dying inside, offices, sign, signs, strange signs, hr, human resources, h r
"Does this desk make my job look big?"
Tags:job, jobs, position, positions, work, offices, title, boss, bosses, status, promotion, promotions, fashion, fashions, world of work, make my butt look big, advice, advise, advising, opinion, opinions, vanity, executive, executives, fashionista, desk, desks, status symbol, status symbols, job title, job titles, show off, boast, boasting, brag, bragging
"Still doing the egg thing?"
Tags:dinner party, party, parties, easter bunny, bunny, bunnies, rabbit, rabbits, implied, implicated, implication, chat, chatting, chatted, chats, shaking, shake hands, socialise, socialize, socialising, socializing, cocktail party, cocktail, cocktails, friend, friends, job, jobs, what do you do, world of work, parallels, parallel, mirror, mirrored
"You'll notice that I was born in 1968—a very prestigious year."
Tags:interview, interviews, interviewing, interview skills, interview success, success, blag, blagging, brag, bragging, hired, hiring, application, apply, applying, work, working, new job, new jobs, career, careers, career advice, arrogance, arrogant, boast, boasting, ego, egos, praise, praising, pride, proud, talent, talents, skill, skills, cv, cv skill, cv skills, resume, resumes, good resume, good resumes, resume writing, cv writing, world of work
"When this is all done, I'd like to try something a little different. Maybe work with children.
Tags:religious, religion, heaven, heavens, creator, creators, creation, creations, creationism, creationist, word play, play on words, career, careers, career change, career goal, career goals, unemployment, unemployed, job change, change, change of, role change, god, gods, godly, chrsitian, christians, christianity, modern world, world of work
"If somebody's listening to this conversation, I need a job."
"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."
Tags:big boss, exec, executive, executives, desk, desks, diy, career, careers, resume, resume skills, good resume, resumes, cv, c v, good cv, cv skills, recruitment, recruiting, hire, hired, hiring, employment, employed, unemployed, unemployment, job, jobs, job application, job applicant, job interview, interview skills, interview skill, interviewee, applicant, application, reject, rejected, harsh, hard, human resources, human resource, hr, h r, school of hard knocks, world of work, hiring officer, hiring officers
"If you're ever sick of anything and your secretary needs some papers signed, I can do your signature perfectly."
Tags:sick, on leave, holiday, holidays, vacation, vacations, fill in, filling in, replace, replacement, sign, signed, signature, signatures, forge, forged, forgery, suck up, secretary, secretarial, boss, big boss, management, middle management, supervisor, supervisors, office ecology, office drone, rat race, office drones, working world, white collar crime, world of work, modern world, corporate, c corporation, corporations, top down